Tuesday, January 1, 2008

New Year's Day

Well, it's one in the afternoon on January 1, 2008, and it's time I got out of bed. My stomach and I are not cooperating at the moment, though. I don't drink, so I'm not hung over, but I still felt the need to punish my digestive track last night.

Team registration for Ride The Lobster started last night, and I'm officially in training. That means Max is going to be running, stretching, biking, pushing, pulling, flexing, riding, and generally taxing all my muscles until I can pass cars on the roads without even breathing heavily. I've already hit the gym twice in the past week, and have made a surprising discovery. This is the heaviest I've been in my life at a whopping 176 lbs (or 800,000 kg, for sss those who live outside the US and trust my math). But at 6'1", and most of that weight lying in my leg muscles, I'm a skinny boy. I have to put on some fat for the races I have planned for 2008.

New years resolution #1: Gain 10 pounds.

So, what does this have to do with punishing my stomach? My girlfriend-slash-personal trainer came down for a couple of days, and in the frantic day and a half of apartment cleaning that I did, I neglected to buy food. So, we did the very couple-y thing and went grocery shopping together. One of the things we picked up was a Naked brand protein smoothie with a dangerous 20 grams of protein per serving.

"Should I get this?"
"Well, it's protein, and you don't eat much meat."
"Yeah?"
"Besides, you're in training. You need stuff like that."

It's supposed to taste a bit like a pina colata, but it's more like drinking sand than anything. I mean, you can taste the pineapple, banana, coconut, and stuff like that, but it is made of dirt. Protein dirt that sticks to your mouth and gives you the most uncomfortable feeling that you need to brush your teeth before you can do anything else.

I'll probably buy it again, too. Yeah, it's an unpleasant experience, but I'll look at the bottle again in the store and think, "20 grams of protein, 250 calories, and 93% juice? How bad could it possibly have been?" It's really not that bad, it's just that the 7% that isn't juice is pure, nutritious sand. They call it soy and whey protein, but it's sand, straight from Azusa, California. Seriously, a drop rolled down the side of the bottle, and after it dried, I could have used it to stip the stain off my bookcase.

We made a couple other grocery-related blunders, but I'm pretty sure this is what has been making a mess of my stomach.

So, dear reader, happy new year. I have every intention of making this year a biggie. Besides Ride The Lobster, which is going to be huge, there's the Whiteface uphill race in Lake Placid, at which I have to redeem my poor performance in 2007, and the Mount Equinox hillclimb in Vermont. That's three long unicycle races in one year. Well, two long races and the crown jewel of long-distance cycling.

Additionally, I'm going to put more focus on my school work, and get my car fixed. I'm also looking to learn how to ride an ultimate wheel or a BC wheel. You know, just for fun...

Since down time is not on the schedule for 2008, I'm going to rest up while I can. I'll keep this blog updated with news, pictures, and maybe some other goodies as I come across them.

Cheers!

1 comment:

Kyle D said...

Dude, I just tried a similar protein fruit smoothie thing from Odwalla. Ingredients start with apple and banana puree, so I figure how bad can it be? Ugh, so sandy. I've had less sand in my sneakers after walking on the beach. They're not cheap drinks either. It might be cheaper to peel a banana and dip it in a sand dune, because it's obvious that sand is the source of this "soy protein".